Wonder Woman fans cannot stand Xena (or Lucy Lawless) and for good reason

Cause she owns. And she has her own planet in the solar system. What do YOU have?

Exhibit A [Newsarama] 03-17-2005

Take note of the date. Just about 5 years since this ~*official*~ news of the Wonder Woman film, and where is it? No where. And it most likely won’t be anywhere for the rest of eternity. Gee, what happened? That ‘official teaser’ was official bullshit. What movie poster (even a teaser) is hand drawn anymore? Its not 1956. Couldn’t even get so much of a stand in model (Witchblade, Conan, etc) at least? Any fanboi who can get THAT excited with no official cast’s logic is beyond me. You’re only setting up yourself for  disappointment.

So that brings me to my fangirl rant…

Just one mention of the actress with the double L initials. or her most noted character playing their lame, one dimensional ‘Amazon Princess’ brings their blood pressure skyrocketing and heads lowered down in the comparison. Too fucking bad! Yeah thats right, call me a Xena zombie. In fact, I’ll wear a tshirt proudly announcing my fantardness for the warrior princess in big, bold print letters just to piss you off. Here are some of my favorite posts of the bitter, jealous Wonder Woman zealots aka anti-Lucy Lawless and Xena. Watch as GenXMaverick blow his load when someone mentions Xena.

Okay, so it is *FINALLY* official. Astonishing X-Men’s Joss Whedon is writing and directing WONDER WOMAN. Now… what elements of Wonder Woman’s comic book legacy is Joss going to use? Consider me solidly in the longstanding pro-George Perez group. Give me the “Gods & Mortals” TPB with Ares and nuclear weapons run amok. Give me Decay, Phobos and our Amazing Amazon beheading Deimos the serpentine son of war god Ares. I want Themyscira and Mount Olympus. Joss Whedon directing gods, goddesses, monsters and demons? HELL YES.

For the sequel? Gotta be The Cheetah! Barbara Minerva in all her savage, bloodthirsty glory. (Sidebar: Thank you, Greg Rucka and Geoff Johns for giving us back the *real* Cheetah! ) I majorly wanna second the poster in the News section who suggested Joss would use the Perez version of Etta Candy for comedic relief. A saucy, witty, take-no-crap Etta cast and directed by Joss Whedon? Oh, the dialogue just writes itself! Love interest? There’ll be one, no question. And I’ll be surprised if it’s not Steve Trevor. And last but definitely not least… if DC doesn’t get Joss to write at least ONE arc of All-Star Wonder Woman next year in tandem with the film’s release, then there is simply no justice in this world. Lastly, here’s the link to the *OFFICIAL* WONDER WOMAN teaser poster released by Warner Bros (by Adam Hughes)! Oh, God… this movie is going to be sooooooooooo good! Um, if anyone happens to score any free copies of the teaser poster this wknd, heh, would you mind sharing???

God, Jericho, we really are disagreeing way too much. I dont want Gods and Monsters, it leads to comparison to Xena, where there will already be too much of that with them both being Amazon. I dont want Cheetah, at all. Too similar to Catwoman, in the public’s eye, I would say the same for the Black Cat in a Spidey movie.
I want Wonder Woman versus Man, or at least the evil of Man. I want WW not to be just a hero of sciety, I want her to be a leader of society. Opinionated,Compassionate, and willing to do whatever it take to do the right thing. A love interest is nice, but I dont want a love story, we have that already with the Spidey movies. I wish Whedon luck, because he really has a chance to do a meaningful movie that is visually appealing as well. One last thing. CHARISMA CHARISMA CHARISMA CHARISMA CHARISMA PLEASE

Perfect. You’ve set the tone that I suspect Joss will follow. Ares should indeed be the core of the story. Apologies to both YDLM and Jack Burton, but the Xena analogy is laughable in the extreme. Comparing a multimillion dollar film franchise like Whedon’s WONDER WOMAN (What multimillion dollar film franchise? There hasn’t been one Wonder Woman film, let alone a franchise) to a syndicated anachronistic barbarian tale like Xena is ridiculous for many, many reasons. You might as well compare Xena to THE LORD OF THE RINGS or THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA (Sorry to disappoint, or be the bearer of bad news, but the majority if not all of the cast and crew of Xena went on to do The Lord of the Rings. Oh yes bb thats right, that cheesy costume designer won an Academy Award for her work on LOTR, Peter Jackson used the same sets, did you forget about New Zealand? We have Karl Urban, Marton Csokas, Craig Parker, among a host of others. And Peter Jackson even asked Lucy Lawless to audition for the part of Galadriel, I know it hurts doesn’t it) If we follow your logic, guys, Marvel shouldn’t even bother trying to do a FANTASTIC FOUR film since THE INCREDIBLES is too much like it. And that’s just a really dumb rationale for what movies should be made. Whedon’s WW is going to be an epic tale. The teaser poster tells us right off the bat what the scope and tone of this movie will be: “Experience The Wonder” That’s something one would say about fantasy films like LOTR or NARNIA. WONDER WOMAN is going to be an epic filled with wonder and grandeur–it is not going to be a weekly syndicated barbarian’s tale filled with cheesy TV special effects. As for The Cheetah being compared to Catwoman? What, should Marvel not include The Black Cat in SPIDER-MAN 3 because Catwoman came out first? Geez, c’mon, guys–very weak arguments there, really.

Jericho, how is it dumb when two completely different people said the same thing at practically the same time without consulting each other. Xena was/is huge, many people want Lucy Lawless to play WonderWoman because of her work on Xena. Their our rumors that FF movie is actively trying to make its self different from The Incredibles. Many critics think all comicbook movies are the same, so why give them more reason to, when you can be different and still true to the character.

A creator can’t afford to think like that. If you’re always worrying about perceived similarities between your work and an earlier story, you’ll cripple your own creativity. All Joss can do is make the best Wonder Woman film he can. If critics make (unfounded) comparisons between this and Xena, he’ll just have to deal with it as it comes, and hope that the end result dispels any such notions.

I don’t believe what I’m hearing. XENA? Dude, your credibility in this debate just takes a nosedive everytime you bring up that 2nd rate sword-and-sorcery show. Xena is much more in the vein of Conan or Red Sonja; she is *not* a superhero (Nobody said she was, you ass).

As for Lucy Lawless… she’s a very one-dimensional performer and is frankly an ugly woman who looks like she’s done more than her fair share of steroids. (I lol’d. Steroids? You can 5′11 and 120 pounds someone who looks like they are on steroids?) You think she’s the greatest thing since sliced bread? (she us) Fine, she’s all yours. (good, more for me) The fact is, you don’t cast ugly people to be lead roles in superhero movies–and Lawless is in no way a sexy, glamorous (or young) actress. Brandon Routh and Christian Bale are sexy, goodlooking men and the same good looks will be required in casting Wonder Woman (What a true role model for girls that it is a requirement for the most famous female superhero to must be beautiful, or else she is little to no value. And for the record, the fuck no Brandon Routh is ’sexy’. Well, at least your horrible taste is consistent).

Honestly, I don’t understand the Xena Zombies (of course not, you wouldn’t know awesomeness when you see it). That show was dull and uninvolving (thats not a word) starring a B-actress (what does that make Lynda Carter?) who always looked like she was on some sort of anabolic steroid. (Again with the steroids!) You want her, you can have her. But if we were betting money? I can safely say she’ll never even screen test for the role. (Nor would she want to) Xena. Pfhah! What a joke. Can we talk about serious actors, please? (Because Lynda Carter was a serious actor) And no Ares? No Cheetah? That’s like making a Superman film without Luthor or a Batman film without The Joker. Those are Wonder Woman’s 2 biggest arch-enemies and this *is* a superhero movie. Sorry, but I’ve had all the “rah-rah-rah” from the Xena Zombies I can stomach. Keep that ugly, 2nd rate syndication star as far away from our Amazon Princess as possible. (oh thank God, you can have your cliche Wonder Woman, and I can have my sexy, Kiwi fruit star to myself and all other Xena zombies and the general public. Because clearly, no one cares about Wonder Woman).

<—— just sitting back as the _______gery (both positive and negative) threatens to run rampant

Here’s the thing fellas, based on script, casting choices, studio interference (or lack thereof), etc., this movie has the potential to be incredibly cool (see the Spidey movies, Superman I and II, the X-Men movies, etc) or incredibly, INCREDIBLY bad (see Catwoman, Batman & Robin), or really somewhere in-between (see Hulk, Daredevil–being lenient here b/c I personally liked it). We won’t really know until more is announced, but I have faith in Whedon and WB to treat the Amazon princess with respect, if nothing else. The costume will be familiar, and I’m sure the actress (whoever she ends up being) will be strong, and if Whedon is writing there’ll be good character dynamics and just the right amount of appropriate-to-the-movie humor.

As for the story ideas thrown out here, truthfully I think both sides have a point, and you need to respect each other’s views, not get into a pissing match (and Jericho, for once I’m calling you out, b/c you kinda started this one). Personally, I think the Perez stuff with Ares is the best story to tell. You can make it relevant, you can make it a spectacle, you can make it deadly and cool and bring in all the stuff we love about Wondy—her strength, her mythology, her struggle with “Man’s world”, etc. But to say that people will compare that to Xena is laughable is well, wrong. Because some people will. Will it be on the same production level, or cheesiness level as Xena? (Wait, I thought Lord of the Rings was amazing…see reference above) God let’s hope not….but people who watched Xena, who have never picked up a WW comic, WILL compare it to that, because it is a comparable idea. We just know the story we’ve read, that Gentleman George crafted, is waaaay cooler (and actually came first) (Whatever became of that?) As for the Cheetah, while I love Dr. Minerva, and would hope they could make her cool, I fear greatly that her character just may not transfer to the big screen without bringing an air of cheesy with her (same reason I PRAY that Venom never gets anywhere near a Spider-Man movie script)–so please save her for the sequel.

and again Jericho—calm down and re-read the posts. nobody has said a word here about wanting this to be compared to Xena; quite the opposite in fact. they’re merely against the Ares idea because they’re afraid that the Xena-zombies as you call them will try to compare our (far-superior) (and you have the nerve to call us zombies) heroine to that camp trash (Because the New Adventures of Wonder Woman was nominated for several Emmys. That Lynda Carter was a Meryl Streep alright, whatever happened to her? Oh wait, didn’t Xena’s composition score by Joseph LoDuca win a few Emmys? Not bad for campy trash). so just relax, my friend….

First off–I’m sorry.. I just am so, so sick of Xena. Ugh. Never liked that show and am 100% convinced anyone who seriously, legitimately wants to see Lawless as Wonder Woman is beyond understanding. I just cannot see the appeal of that woman and *never* will. (Your loss) Additionally, I stayed up all night to finish Chapter 5 of Posters: Disassembled–and then the Whedon story broke 1st thing this morning. Which I wasn’t expecting until late this afternoon or early tonight. So, dude… yeah, I’m crankly as all hell and desperately need to sleep. Thank you for what you said about Ares. I totally agree with about saving The Cheetah for the sequel. Logically, it makes sense plotwise and in terms of Diana’s purpose in Man’s World: she’s here to bring peace and the only reason she comes to our world is to stop war (and Ares is The God Of War). (and THIS is not campy to you?) Anyway, I need sleep BADLY. So, not running or hiding. Just resting. Enjoy P/DA. Hope you have some fun on this thread. I won’t be back until way late. Sorry if I ruffled feathers. But God, please… no more of that woman, I beg of you. (did she pee in your fruit loops? you seem rather bitter, as if holding a grudge. I mean really, is it her fault that Xena owns? I mean, you can’t hold the blame on her).

Okay… I wasn’t trying to deliberately hurt your feelings. And please remember that at the time of what you’re referring to I had been up for 35 hours w/o sleep. You try and do that and see how cheerful and relaxed you feel. Second–it is incredibly disturbing to me and very frustrating over the past 5+ years of listening to the Xena zombies insist/demand that ONLY Lucy Lawless can (and should) play Wonder Woman (Xenites don’t give a damn about no Wonder Woman). After all these years, I can’t lie–these people need to sit down and just give it up. Lawless will never be WW; (thank God) case closed. Let it go. It is not happening, not now, not ever–if for no other reason that she is past the age for it. If even Catherine Zeta-Jones (who’s only 1 year older than Christian Bale) is pretty much no longer in the running for it, Lawless is also disqualified for her age, too.

Huthaifa… when it comes to Wonder Woman, I’ve been a fan for over 30 years. I know, I know; typical stereotype of a gay man–obsessed with Wonder Woman. Anyway, when you asserted Lawless as a legitimate candidate, I was just so tired of the hype about her. What has it been, 6, 7, 8 years since XENA came out? Oy, that is a loooooooooong time to listen the zealous XENA addicts. (poor bb) She’s just a horrible choice in every way. I won’t apologize for pointing out how bad she is as an actress and how ugly she’d be as Wonder Woman. It’s true whether the XENA crowd is willing to admit it or not (why would we admit to something that isn’t true?). Is she a nice person? Yes. (well at least you can be of some decency) Is she a wonderful fighter who was perfect for the role of XENA? Yes, she was Xena and the perfect one for it.

But she never was and never will be Wonder Woman (thank God). I genuinely regret if you take my slamming her as hurtful because it is not meant to be. I also don’t want you to feel angry or resentful because you know you’re one of my favorite posters. However, the pro-Xena crowd will never get me to even consider their pro-Lawless arguments. Hell will freeze over first. You’re welcome to believe it; you will not get me to even entertain the possibility. Never. Ever. (I know it burns doesn’t it?) I don’t want you to be mad… but I also don’t want to encourage the rabid XENA zombies to post here. (you’re lucky I wasn’t posting here at the time), After 5 or 6 (or more) years of “Lucy, Lucy, Lucy!”, I can’t take her (or her fans) seriously anymore (you never had any seriousness to begin with. Look at the way you type! Lay of the caps lock and bold print, will you) In this instance, I don’t “Love Lucy.” (Lucille Ryan > Lucille Ball)

Finally–this is the origin story of Wonder Woman. Even Joss himself said people “have never met her.” This is going to be the moviegoing public’s introduction to WW. Which means the contest to select an Amazon. The mission to Man’s World. (The mission to man’s world lolz) The preaching of love, peace and compassion. Her mission was to stop war. That is how (pardon the pun) Wonder Woman Begins. If any one villain is a legitimate alternative to Ares, God Of War? It’s The Cheetah. The Cheetah is to Wonder Woman what The Joker is to Batman and what Luthor is to Superman (A female embodiment of a Cheetah[1], with breasts and a vagina, no not campy at all…). She is Diana’s most famous villain of all time (like people know who the fuck Cheetah is). She’s the biggie, numero uno, the most well-known (“Challenge Of The Super-Friends” ring a bell?) (actually, it doesn’t). Bottom line: it will be an origin story. The Greek mythology will be a big part of that story. And the villain will either be Ares or The Cheetah. I’m willing to bet good money on all of the above. I care about your feelings and I’m sorry I offended you. But in this case, I am 100% certain what you’re insisting should happen with Whedon’s WW will never even come close to happening. That is not a personal attack–it’s what I feel is a matter of fact. It isn’t a putdown of you to say I think your ideas are terrible; I still value you as a person.

Note: Since 2005, Joss Whedon has dropped from the Wonder Woman project.

I must not forget to put the extra salt on the wounds…this one in particular is damaging. Lucy Lawless as Wonder Woman. You gotta love how that sounds Bruce Timm and co. on the casting ideal & prototype of Wonder Woman as Lucy Lawless… “…its like, DUH!” I know that had to hurt.